Out Of Network

Feb. 17th, 2026 10:00 am
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Posted by Not Always Right

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I work for Medicare and get all kinds of calls. Most calls are fine, but there are some instances where things go off the wall. From mental issues to entitled family members who think being married/children/parents of an individual on Medicare gives them access to the person's record. (HIPAA says no, BTW).

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(no subject)

Feb. 17th, 2026 10:00 am
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I’m the author of Larry: Friend of Boris. When our youngest was about two years old, he was obessed with our egg timer. He loved the ticking noise it made and would squeal with joy when it rang. It was quickly named Ticker and became his best friend. As with most things a rambunctious toddler […]

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(no subject)

Feb. 17th, 2026 09:00 am
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I’m visiting a friend with my daughter when my daughter notices a cat hiding under one of the chars and tries to get it to come out. Friend: “[Daughter] please leave [cat] alone. He’s a big wimp and afraid of anyone that isn’t his family. You don’t want to scare him.” Daughter: “can I pet […]

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Read Every Time We Celebrate, We’re Over The Moon!

Customer #1: "Hey, man, you shouldn’t be buying this stuff unless you’re from a country that celebrates Lunar New Year. Or unless your wife is."
Customer #2: *Holding a basket full of red envelopes and decorations.* "This is America. I can celebrate whatever holiday I want, and I don't have to explain myself to you."

Read Every Time We Celebrate, We’re Over The Moon!

A Return To Sanity

Feb. 17th, 2026 04:00 am
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Posted by Not Always Right

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Caller: "That first agent I spoke to was so s***ty! They kept talking about a return policy, and that's s***ty too! Everything about your company is so s***ty!"
I was literally just flipping through tabs on Amazon as I half-listened to the tirade that was minutes in length, when finally, she started raising her voice and screaming at me:

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[syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed

Posted by Not Always Right

Read The Storm Is Strongest Inside The Mall

One week there's a weather warning for the entire county, with one of two options: there will be an ICE STORM like there's NO TOMORROW, and all the snow on the ground will freeze, and it will be very dangerous even to be outside... or it will be 50 degrees and pleasant and balmy.
Guess which one the county prepared for, and guess which one actually happened?

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Posted by Not Always Right

Read Most People Use Automated Minute Takers These Days

Woman: "So let's discuss what the other groups are doing in similar markets and compare—"
Me: "—excuse me, but would you mind putting on headphones for your meeting?"
Woman: *Turns to me, muting herself.* "No. If you want peace and quiet, stay at home, or book a private office."

Read Most People Use Automated Minute Takers These Days

Wood You Be More Specific

Feb. 17th, 2026 12:00 am
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Posted by Not Always Right

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Me: "What kind of wood would you like your table to be made of?"
Caller: "Real wood, obviously!"
Me: *Huge sigh.* "Our basic options are pine or oak, but we can also get cherry, mahogany, or a few other varieties upon request."
Caller: "OMG!" *Yes, she spelled OMG out loud.* "Just wood! How hard can it be to make me a wood table?"

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[ SECRET POST #6982 ]

Feb. 16th, 2026 06:14 pm
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[personal profile] case posting in [community profile] fandomsecrets

⌈ Secret Post #6982 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


01.



More! )


Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 25 secrets from Secret Submission Post #997.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Came Back Out Of The Blue

Feb. 16th, 2026 10:30 pm
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Posted by Not Always Right

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A customer I can only describe as shady entered our liquor store and spent ten minutes browsing. I stayed at the checkout and watched him on the CCTV.
He ended up shoving two bottles of Johnnie Walker Blue down his pants and walked out. I called the police and told them what happened.

Read Came Back Out Of The Blue

Mum Is About To Cause A Bloodbath

Feb. 16th, 2026 10:00 pm
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Posted by Not Always Right

Read Mum Is About To Cause A Bloodbath

I was out shopping with my mum when I felt the familiar feeling of blood running down my face. I pinched my nose and turned to the nearest shop worker.
Me: "Excuse me, do you have a toilet?"
Worker: "No, I'm so sorry, it's staff only."

Read Mum Is About To Cause A Bloodbath

No Lights, Camera, Action!

Feb. 16th, 2026 09:00 pm
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Read No Lights, Camera, Action!

A week later, the power company was all over the news, bragging about how they'd finished power restoration to the area. Everyone had power again!
Except us.

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[syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed

Posted by Not Always Right

Read Summoned A Worker Drone But Got The Retail Demon

I hear the bell and am at the customer service desk within seconds. I see a woman with her daughter, maybe eleven or twelve years old, standing at the desk.
Me: "How can I be of assistance, ma'am?"
Customer: "Oh, no, I don't need any. I'm just showing my daughter how to summon one of you."

Read Summoned A Worker Drone But Got The Retail Demon

Math Is Your Friend, Part 20

Feb. 16th, 2026 06:45 pm
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Posted by Not Always Right

Read Math Is Your Friend, Part 20

Customer: "Oh, I'm not seeing the 10% coming off."
Me: "That will happen at the end of the transaction, ma'am."
Customer: "But how will you remember to take the 10% off every item?"
Me: "It's 10% off of your whole purchase, ma'am. It's quicker to just do it at the end."
Customer: *Getting angry.* "No, it's not! You're trying to rip me off! I want 10% taken off of every item!"

Read Math Is Your Friend, Part 20

Shift Happens

Feb. 16th, 2026 05:00 pm
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Posted by Not Always Right

Read Shift Happens

Me: "Uh, [Coworker], is that Tupperware for us night shift workers?"
Coworker: "Duh! Can't you see the label?"
Me: "Is it supposed to say, 'For the night shift only'?"
Coworker: "Yes! Wait… oh no."

Read Shift Happens

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Posted by Not Always Right

Read Maternal Instinct? Nah. Survival Instinct? Also Nah.

Mother: *To child.* "[Son], don't go there."
Astonishingly, that half-hearted verbal warning was not enough to keep the kid from coming back for a third try.
Coworker: "You have to actually watch your children and physically keep them from going places they shouldn't."

Read Maternal Instinct? Nah. Survival Instinct? Also Nah.

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