![[syndicated profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/feed.png){kind=small}
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 10:00 pm
Read Don’t Let Nothing Happen Again!
Boss: "We got a complaint online. Says, 'Store attendant was rude and unhelpful today. One star.'"
Me: "Uh… okay? I don't recall anyone walking out, refusing service, or leaving unhappy."
Boss: "Don’t let it happen again!"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 09:30 pmRead Humphrey’s Little Hitchhikers
This was the late 1960s, and Lyndon B Johnson was president.
There was a fad at the time of kids about my age opening the doors of cars that were stopped in traffic and getting into them.
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 09:00 pmRead You Need To Alter Your Mind, Not Your Pants
Customer: "These are a little too small, but I really like 'em. Since I’d have to put in extra work to make ’em fit, can you lower the price?"
Me: "Sorry, ma’am. We’re a charity thrift shop. These pants are already about as cheap as it gets."
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 08:00 pmRead Corporate Loves To Give A Free Speech
Corporate Guy: "I don't see how that's the issue. Look at the current campaign, it's simple: 'Get [item] for free when you spend $50.' What’s confusing about that?"
Cashier: "The problem is that customers are stupid and impatient. They stop reading after the word free. They hear free and assume it’s just… free. They're always surprised when we have to tell them about what the conditions are, such as in this case… spending fifty."
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 07:00 pmRead So, Apparently, The Magic Word Is Racism
Manager: "Well, sir, guess what! Calling me that specific racial slur was the magic word and has allowed me to open the super special high security vault at the back of the back of the store where we actually do have one of those left in stock."
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 05:55 pmRead That’s An Expensive Burn Rate
Operator: "We think there’s something wrong with the sorter. Smells like hot electrical."
It’s 1 AM on a winter night. The on-call tech doesn’t want to leave his warm bed and drive an hour to investigate.
Tech: "Call me back when you see flames." *Hangs up.*
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 05:45 pmRead When You Run Ahead And Fall Behind At The Same Time
I walk over to the shelf to show him the item, answer a few questions about it, and he chooses which one he wants.
I turn to head back to my register. The customer practically speed-walks over to the register, passing me up. He gets there when I am about twenty feet away.
Customer: *Annoyed.* "Um, is there anyone who can ring me up?"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 05:00 pmRead The Service Desk Specializes In Second Opinions
Customer: "Hi, where are you keeping the things that were held after the checkout lanes crashed?"
Me: "Those are all over at the service desk, ma’am. They’ll be able to help you there."
Customer: *Shrugs. "Okay."
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 04:00 pm
I'm working my register when my coworker one lane over, waves a hand to the line, her eyes flicking to a specific item in a customer’s cart:
Coworker: "I can help who’s nuts!"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 03:00 pmRead That’s A Grande Load Of Nonsense
Customer: "Grande quad, extra-dry cappuccino with almond milk, half a pump of hazelnut, half a pump of mocha, extra cinnamon powder steamed into the milk, topped with cold foam but only if you can blend it with coconut milk, not regular milk, and can you put the espresso shots in a separate cup so I can pour them myself?"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 02:30 pmRead That Free Stuff Had A Cost
I'm a teenage girl in high school at the time. I come home to see my mom sitting in the living room, looking confrontational.
Mom: "Would you like to explain why I found condoms in your room?!"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 01:30 pm
Woman: "Go get your god-d*** dog before someone hits it!"
Me: "I don’t have a dog. I reported seeing a dog, though. Is that what you mean?"
Woman: "He needs to be contained. Why would you just let him run around town? What if he bites a child?"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 01:00 pmRead The Kind Of Help This Customer Needs Is Not The Kind You Can Provide
A customer is standing at an empty desk in another department, about forty to fifty feet away from us. Instead of walking over to us, he starts shouting:
Customer: "HELP!"
He does this over and over, while staring at us.
Read The Kind Of Help This Customer Needs Is Not The Kind You Can Provide
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 12:45 pmnotalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 12:00 pmRead Even Getting Inside Is Laborious
A few weeks later, contractions again, we drove up again, and they wanted to send us home again. My wife was adamant that this was for real, and we were not going anywhere. They were saying we could go and stay in a hotel (this was 10 PM).
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 11:45 amnotalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 11:00 amRead Things Have To Be Fair In Fairy Tales
Everyone realized: Mom was just trying to sneak her kids onto the ride together. They slipped into the pre-ride movie area ahead of us, and nobody alerted staff. All of us in the single rider line were fuming and bonding over her audacity.
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 11:00 amI’m at the child psychologists getting tested for a learning disability (It turned out I needed glasses and did not have dyslexia as originally suspected). The psychologist is asking me questions. “Do you ever get teased by the other children?” “Not often. Sometimes” I replied “Is it about your chin?” I made a confused noise […]
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-09-15 10:00 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
