![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Sep. 22nd, 2025 09:00 am![[syndicated profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/feed.png){kind=small}
notalwaysright_feedQ. Where are you from? ME: London Q: But where are you from originally? ME; London Q; But where are your family from? ME: London Q; But where is your home? ME; (beginning to lose patience) LONDON. Q: But where were you born? ME, St. Mary’s (Obviously, no-one is ever born in London! We all […]
Tangled Priorities
Sep. 22nd, 2025 09:00 amnotalwaysright_feedRead Tangled Priorities
I was coiling up a hose on its hanger after watering some plants in the garden center. A customer who has been watching the process pipes up:
Customer: "There's a better way to do that, you know!"
I kind of just nod and smile and mumble something like "Oh yeah?" and continue what I'm doing. I have things to do, and I'm pretty sure I have a good handle on how to put a hose away.
Read Tangled Priorities
(no subject)
Sep. 22nd, 2025 08:00 amnotalwaysright_feedAll the time I hear people complain about microwaving fish in the office break room. At my office, someone did something much worse: Someone made kimchi in the office fridge. This wasn’t accidental kimchi. This wasn’t ’someone left vegetables to rot in the fridge by mistake’. Someone brought in vegetables, used the break room to […]
Old Habits Cry Hard
Sep. 22nd, 2025 07:00 amnotalwaysright_feedRead Old Habits Cry Hard
Customer: *Snapping.* "Where are my cigarettes?!"
Me: "Let me check. One moment."
I ask the cashier who rang her up.
Me: "Do you remember if she left with them?"
Read Old Habits Cry Hard
A Storm Of Entitlement, Part 7
Sep. 21st, 2025 11:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead A Storm Of Entitlement, Part 7
Customer: "Excuse me? Can you just get me these in a super king? Then I’ll be out of your hair."
Me: "Ma’am, we’re closing. Everyone needs to evacuate."
Customer: "I know, I know, but I’m parked right outside, so it's easy for me to evacuate. If you could just sell me these sheets, I’d be gone in a second."
That Blew Up Quickly
Sep. 21st, 2025 09:30 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead That Blew Up Quickly
This happened back in the late 80s, during the times of The Troubles. I was living in Felixstowe, a coastal town in Suffolk, which is about as far away from Northern Ireland as you can go in England without getting your feet wet.
Read That Blew Up Quickly
Missing The Point So Wildly It Flew Over The Arc De Triomphe
Sep. 21st, 2025 07:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead Missing The Point So Wildly It Flew Over The Arc De Triomphe
I’m leading an English-speaking tour, explaining the history and symbolism of the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier beneath the Arc de Triomphe. A tourist raises their hand.
Tourist: "But… couldn’t they just find out who he is now, using DNA? They do it on TV all the time!"
Read Missing The Point So Wildly It Flew Over The Arc De Triomphe
They’re The Seoul Survivor
Sep. 21st, 2025 05:55 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead They’re The Seoul Survivor
Boss: "Hey, Chinese guy! Can you grab me that box cutter from the back?"
Coworker #1: "He’s Korean."
Boss: "Yeah, yeah. Korean, Chinese, all the same."
Fashion Advice, Fashionably Late
Sep. 21st, 2025 05:45 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead Fashion Advice, Fashionably Late
Customer: *Staring at her cart with a dreamy smile.* "Hmm… I don’t know if I want these. Or maybe these. What do you think? Do these jeans look better than the sweater?"
Me: *Polite smile, trying not to glance at the clock.* "They’re both nice, ma’am."
She keeps picking out items one by one, holding them up, waiting for my "fashion expertise." Meanwhile, her whole cart is sitting on my counter, half-scanned, half-ignored.
The Math Isn’t Mathing And The Contract Isn’t Contracting
Sep. 21st, 2025 05:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead The Math Isn’t Mathing And The Contract Isn’t Contracting
Customer: "I know I am six months into a twelve-month contract, but how much longer have I got?"
Me: "…Six months."
Customer: "D***! Really? I thought it was like, two or something."
Read The Math Isn’t Mathing And The Contract Isn’t Contracting
The Customer Is Never Right (Twice)
Sep. 21st, 2025 03:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead The Customer Is Never Right (Twice)
It’s a busy evening with lots of events in town, and we’re running reservations only. I’m about to finish my shift and hand things off to the junior managers when a woman rocks up to the door.
Woman: "Reservation for two, under [Name]."
I check the book. Nothing.
Rum, Coke, And Regret
Sep. 21st, 2025 02:30 pmnotalwaysright_feed
Many years ago, my family (myself, my two brothers, my sister, my sister-in-law, and my parents) went on vacation to Las Vegas. Everyone was very hyped up for it, except for me, as the youngest of the group; the story about being twenty in a city where you had to be twenty-one to do most anything, like be present in casinos, is a can of worms that need not be opened.
This is the story of how the trip ended.
The Educator Needs Some Educating
Sep. 21st, 2025 01:30 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead The Educator Needs Some Educating
Later in the evening, he glances at the pool table where a group of African American guys are playing.
Teacher: *Grumbling.* "Great. Look who’s hogging the table."
When You Totally Clocked Out
Sep. 21st, 2025 01:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead When You Totally Clocked Out
I have a couple at my checkout. I'm scanning the items when the guy looks at his watch.
Guy: "Oh, my watch has stopped. I wonder when that happened."
(no subject)
Sep. 21st, 2025 12:45 pmnotalwaysright_feed(The following takes place over group text with the rest of our family.) Sister: There should be a rule that all executives know how to type and put together proper English sentences before they get promoted past manager. Some of these people are embarrassing. Sister: I’m proud of my spelling, and it wasn’t auto correct. […]
(no subject)
Sep. 21st, 2025 11:45 amnotalwaysright_feedI work at Walmart. This story reminded me of one that happened over here: https://notalwaysright.com/supervision-is-a-parenting-staple/310156/ A little kid was running around the store like crazy near where I was restocking pasta sauce. She decided, at some point, to run full tilt into the support column. She hit the column with a very loud sound and […]
(no subject)
Sep. 21st, 2025 11:00 amnotalwaysright_feed(I came out as transgender to my family.I was born a girl but I identify as male) Mom:I can’t believe it,I sewed all those dresses for nothing. Dad:Calm down sweetie.She’ll grow out of it in a short time. Grandpa:Can you two both come back to reality?Now you have two sons,big deal.You have living,healthy kids,enjoy them […]
(no subject)
Sep. 21st, 2025 10:00 amnotalwaysright_feedI work as Release Manager Engineering for an IT company, basically what I do is schedule firmware updates for the different products of the company. Last week we did a successful update for a client, and today I received an email, that went like this: Client: Hi, the update of the last product didn’t worked, […]
(no subject)
Sep. 21st, 2025 09:00 amnotalwaysright_feed(I came out as lesbian a few years ago and my aren’t the most supportive to say the least but they do invite me for dinner on grandma’s birthday since she wanted me there.I’ve always been close to her.) Dad:Can anyone pass the salt? (I reached for the shaker since it was right in front […]